Why All Kids Should Grow Up In Africa – For Mom

Mom, you tried to teach me a lot of things when I was young. One thing that you tried to teach and drill into our brains was the tendency to clean up after ourselves. You tried numerous tactics – five minutes of clean up, pick up ten things before you move on, bribing us, yelling at us to get us to do chores – but even after 18 years of that, my dorm rooms and apartments were always untidy.

That’s all changed now. When I use a dish, I wash it immediately, sometimes before I even eat the food I’ve prepared. Food is always hidden, closed in a container, and then put in a trunk. After I wear clothes, I put them in the dirty laundry immediately, or if they can be worn again, I hang them up on my line. After I use a pen, I put it back in its holder. I make sure all of my doors and drawers and lids are closed and that there’s nothing on my desk when I go out of my house. Everything has its place, and everything is always in its place. Papers are never scattered or left out. I sweep once or twice daily. I still don’t make my bed (sorry, it’s hard with a mosquito net) but I do make sure that my net is neatly tucked in on all sides whether I’m inside or outside of it. I weed my backyard, and hang my towel up to dry instead of leaving it in a heap. Nothing is ever left on the floor.

What has led to this unexpected change of character? What has suddenly made messy, childish Abby, into the responsible and clean person she is today? The answer is one word:

Infestation.

I do all of these things, because if I do not, mice or bugs will eat, crap in, or try to inhabit things that I would prefer to be eaten by me, not crapped in by anyone, and uninhabited.

If every time a child left crumbs on the kitchen table, it meant that a new horde of mice would move in and eat their food (this food being special food that they could only buy in a certain corner of the country, hours and hours away from the certain corner of the country in which they live), they would probably wipe up the crumbs.

If every time a child left his bed unmade, mosquitoes would get in and buzz in his ears all night, or mice would get in and eat his earplugs, he would probably make his bed.

If their favorite clothes or important papers were eaten once after a child left them out, that child would probably make sure to put them away the next time.

There may be holes in my theory. Gambian children grow up in Africa, and they are always dirty and breaking things. Maybe maturity and caring for objects is vital for this method of child rearing to be effective, but it has undoubtedly worked for my 25-year-old self. I don’t know what would have happened if I was sent to live in a hut with no water or electricity when I was 8 years old, but I may have saved my mom a lot of grief.